Anti-Aging For Pets: It’s On Like Donkey Kong

Okay, what the fuck is this?

I decided to check in to Advaliant after a couple of months of not running any of their offers. I managed to stumble across this absolute gem of an offer. I can only assume that it’s geo-targeted to America.

The niche? Anti-aging…for pets.

I shit you not. Check the link.

Petipaaws: Your Pet’s Gonna Live 30% Longer, Or Ya Money Back

Click here if you ain’t American.

I’m sorry but this takes the rebill business model to new lows. I can half understand the principle behind an anti-aging product for, you know, humans. Because Average Joe might just notice that he feels ten years lighter after popping a few pills. But your pet dog? How’s woof woof for a testimonial?

My favourite part of the landing page is this:

Anti-aging for dogs

Try it risk free? YOU MEAN IF I POP THEM MYSELF MY PUPPY WILL LIVE FOREVER?

The thing that really boggles my mind is the idea that this product is actually being packaged in to a monthly rebill. I’m guessing the customer simply pays until his pet cops it, then cancels his credit card to get out of the monthly charges.

picture-10

Please, somebody.

Define the criteria of a successful 30 day free trial when it comes to pets and anti-aging. Do I assume that if Rocky is still wagging his tail after four weeks, and still eating as per the norm, it’s been a raging success and he’s going to live forever?

I don’t know.

I do know that I’m going to promote it.

Sign up to Advaliant here and push your own anti-pet-death Resveratrol today.

It’s shit hot. 35 bucks per victim guaranteed.

About the author

Finch
Finch

A 29 year old high school dropout (slash academic failure) who sold his soul to make money from the Internet. This blog follows the successes, fuck-ups and ball gags of my career in affiliate marketing.

17 Comments

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  • Thanks for outing my niche!

    Hint:
    Use display ads with Snoop Dog and promote it with a dog flog featuring the dynamic dog-duo “PetiPAAWS and PetiWEED”.

  • Sorry dude! The dog flog deserves a public rub.

    I should offer some disclosure that my link to the product WAS actually an affiliate link.

    I figure affiliates love spending time at home with their pets. I’m gonna monetize that shit on Affbuzz.

    BUY BUY BUY

  • hmm, if i’m correct, teeth whitening for animals should be just around the corner – creating a wordpress blog now!

  • Sounds like a good idea if you ask me… people REALLY love their animals. My girlfriend it a cat-nut and cant get enough of her cat lmao. She’d buy it.

  • From reading one post it seems a decent place to rambling comment/question.

    I am a fairly decent software engineer gone rampant on a quest for financial freedom. Left me job and burnt bridges on the way on the road of business development, and what could be better than starting with affiliate marketing.

    Alas, I drown my sorrow in a drink (Mainly water to save money), when I started to realize that 99.99% of the offers are scams to some degree, and just couldn’t start with a single campaign for fear of dear conscience retaliation.

    Do you know and affiliate program that have decent products to promote before I sell my freedom for food and mitigate my pain with real booze.

  • Yo, I know the feeling. I made a similar hasty exit from a web development agency when I was still pretty new to AM. I still am now. There’s money to be had though.

    I suggest you check out Neverblue for a good mix of offers on a CPA basis. If you want to go in to the more long-term cost-per-sale market, you should check out somewhere like Commission Junction. It houses a lot of world famous brands and you’ll find more than your fair share of respectable shit to promote there.

    There’s also the Amazon affiliate program, eBay Partner Network…in fact, many famous retailers have their own affiliate programs that you can sign up to on their respective sites.

    They’re all good options. But these shady rebill offers are popular with affiliates for a reason. They pay hard.

  • Thanks mate,
    Ye, I guessed the popularity reason of these shady rebill offers. But as of yet, for me, it involves some conscience bending an art I didn’t practice often. so far…

    By the way, great blog. Funny I would bump into such rich content while doing the market research nominated products.

  • Thanks for a great blog.

    A question: Do you think that someone who’s a pretty good writer, but not that good at math, and not knowing one lick of php has a prayer at affiliate marketing?

    ie, can I get by with Excel & other tools, and merely knowing how to find your post where you explain how to do a php redirect? Or am I going to get my ass kicked? 🙂

  • Ha ha, this has gotta take the cake in terms of niche selling. I’m going to wait and see how this performs before I push it if I decide to.

  • Tom: You don’t need to know PHP but it definitely helps. I only know intermediate PHP. I’m no expert by any means, but then, it doesn’t really matter what you already know. The only thing that matters is whether you’re capable of solving the problems that you face along the way. If that means outsourcing, go for it.

    I think it’s much more likely that an able writer who can’t code will succeed, as opposed to an able coder who can’t write. If you’re willing to get your hands dirty, you should be fine.

  • Read the site, the part next to the little clack dog with the points – The ingredients work- glucocamine, calcium- these are all helpful for a pet who is aging, especially if you have a dog with joint problems

  • Finch,

    With a million affiliate networks out there… what would you in you expettise consider the best to work with from
    a advertiser/manufacturer point of view? We are considering starting an affiliate program for our product line but we dont knowwhat networks to choose. Whats hot?

  • It really depends on what sort of structure the product is based on. Would you be looking to pay out based on cost per sale or cost per sale?

    I know a lot of guys have success out there by implementing their own affiliate programs and bypassing the network “middleman”.

    It’s hard to say what would work best for you without knowing what it is that you’re trying to sell. Some networks are great for certain verticals – it’s all horses for courses.

  • It’s a lose-lose proposition for the lead.

    Because the pet will live forever, the rebills will be coming in in perpetuity.

    Then again, you’ll save on buying a new dog?

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