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How To Become A Martyr For Affiliate Networks
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Finch’s Guide To Riding Sleeping Giants
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Creating High Demand With A Fake Error Page

How To Become A Martyr For Affiliate Networks

Sometimes, as an affiliate, I wake up and ask myself – “Whose bitch will I become today?”

This is a contentious issue that I’ve wanted to address for a while. It involves affiliates being taken by the wrists and directed off a cliff face by profit-hungry networks. I’m talking about the networks who send out newsletters or allow their account managers to quietly nudge a publisher towards promoting an offer in a way that is harmful to the affiliate’s business interests.

Now you know I wouldn’t dare to cry “misled” when my job is often to deceive with a smile. But I feel sorry for the affiliates who fall victim to some of the gospel being thrown out there.

I regularly find emails in my inbox (funnily enough) disclosing information on the hottest new dating offers. Sky high conversion rates, I’m told. Jump on it now or forever hold your peace! I feel like I should be sitting here stroking a puppy with a tear in my eye at the thought of saying no. This is all standard procedure, of course. When you push a lot of dating leads, you’re going to get a lot of dating offers. What I find slightly disturbing is the fact that some of these newsletters actively encourage their affiliates to promote adult dating sites on strictly non-adult traffic sources.

Wait, hold on a second. Isn’t this supposed to be a two-way relationship?

Let’s not be naive. Most networks, and most affiliates who’ve been round the block, are aware that it’s possible to cloak and “game” traffic sources to make a lot of money in a short space of time. But in my opinion, this is a choice that the affiliate must shoulder.

If a network is actively encouraging a newbie affiliate to hide his links and sling Flirt leads on Facebook, there can be only one side to the relationship. The affiliate takes on the role of kamikaze missile. A helpless fucking lemming, with the sole purpose of wham bam thank you ma’am. The network may pocket a short term burst of revenue, and the affiliate may even survive a Facebook account ban by the skin of his teeth.

But it’s just another example of greed in an industry that would short-change it’s own mother for what Ryan Eagle keeps in his garage. By the way, Ryan, if you’ve got my entire team of scantily clad buxom wench cheerleaders parked in your garage, I might have to call the cops.

Affiliates face a tough choice when it comes to selecting dating offers to promote. It’s a twisted niche where the dirtier you’re prepared to play, the easier it is to get profitable. Facebook doesn’t like offers that are too sexually suggestive. PlentyOfFish hates direct competitors that are free to use. Right there you have the two easiest sells for any dating site.

“Oh so it’s free and full of sluts? BACK OF THE NET!”

Promoting the boldest offers with the boldest promises will nearly always guarantee you the boldest returns. But your scammy little dating ad is probably not what Zuckerberg had in mind when he was looking to monetize the world’s biggest college brain-fart.

Many newbie affiliates get their first taste of success by taking these dangerous paths, promoting offers that push the envelope of what’s acceptable on any given traffic source. Inspired by the words of wisdom from a generic cake-faced affiliate manager who tells you “all the ballers are cloaking on Facebook”, I can see why somebody just getting started would be turned over to the dark side.

Does the affiliate manager care that promoting Offer X is against the guidelines of Facebook or POF? Of course not. It’s this kind of shoddy affiliate management that produces all the glory of double digit profits without any of the hassle of having to maintain your now burnt-to-shit bridges.

So I’ll keep it simple. Here are two suggestions to keep everybody happy.

1. If you’re a network…

Don’t publicly encourage the promotion of adult/restricted offers on traffic sources where the affiliate’s account – and thus ability to put dinner on his family’s table – is in jeopardy. It’s just not cricket. By all means, show the way to those experimental publishers who come asking. But you shouldn’t be encouraging kamikaze marketing when we all have a responsibility to maintain some integrity in the industry.

2. If you’re an affiliate…

Don’t become a network’s Martyr for risky advertising and short-term profits. Understand that you don’t get to sleep with seven smoking hot account managers just because you sacrificed your Facebook account to the tune of 7 leads.

She may look hot in her tiny AIM pic telling you “all the bloggers are doing it”, but you really shouldn’t copy shady marketing practices unless you actually know how to use them. No matter what your affiliate manager, myself, or any other worthless blogger of this mass circle-jerk claims.

Recommended This Week:

Finch’s Guide To Riding Sleeping Giants

“What’s your favourite niche to promote?” I’ve been asked this same question so many times that it’s a wonder I haven’t snapped up the domain FinchSellsDatingSoSTFU.com

“Whatever you’re not working on.” is my new default answer.

It sounds like a spiteful retort but it’s actually quite true. I do spend a vast amount of my time running like a little girl from the heaving masses of affiliate marketing competition.

When you first sign up with an affiliate network, you could be forgiven for assuming that the world revolves around dieting, dating, getting rich at home and MMORPGs. The large majority of my income has been generated in these niches so I’m not going to turn in to a contrarian snob by suggesting that you’re a fool for pursuing them.

What I would say, however, is that the further you run from the herd of affiliates, the easier your life will become for a number of reasons.

I’ve ventured away from the standard arbitrage mindset in recent months. I’ve been developing a business strategy of finding and mounting the sleeping giants in niches that very few affiliates dare to enter. Now what the hell does that mean? It sounds like I’ve been galivanting on some sexual adventure of epicly seedy proportions, which would probably make for a standard blog post from my pen.

By sleeping giants, I’m referring to websites that are run with all the best of intentions, and offering all the right content – but those that are simply resounding failures when it comes to the owner’s ability to monetize his creation. A sleeping giant in marketing terms is a website that COULD make the owner a fortune, if only he knew that he had a business asset on his hands.

These are my absolute favourite kind of websites. I like to invest in them, I like to copy them, and I like to sit at my desk salivating at the prospect of how my filthy affiliate paws would spend the money I’d make from them.

Do you know what happens when you try to launch an “authority” website in a niche like weight loss these days? Without an eye watering monetary investment, you’ll end up with about six hits per day. Four from your own IP and two from the poor bastard who clicked your Digged review by mistake.

There’s money in the niche but you know what? There was money in being the first man on the moon too. In relative ecommerce years, you’re about five decades too late. It’s happened. It’s gone. So get over it and find something else.

Go find yourself a sleeping giant. Some of the qualities I look for in a potential investment are as follows:

1. Is the owner likely to undervalue his website?

Because if the owner is wise enough to see the money in his creation, I might as well just use my investment to build something similar. I’ve spoken to countless forum owners about buying their creations. Many of these people simply don’t understand the potential in having an email list of 10000 active targeted users in a highly profitable niche. Forums can be great “sleeping giants”. Particularly if you search out the messageboards that have been dead for months.

Forum webmasters rarely value their sites in realistic currency. They value it by the egotistical kick they get out of being head admin. If it no longer satisfies their ego, the price drops. Somebody like me can step in and monetize their creation in the matter of hours. Blogs that have been dead for a couple of months are another of my favourite targets. If the owner was only in it for the hobby of blogging, and he’s no longer blogging, he’s likely to let the site go on the cheap.

2. How major are the changes I would need to make to see increased profit?

I recently purchased an “Adsense automated” site in an obscure niche where I had a directly relevant product to promote to the site’s audience. The owner was claiming $150/month profit from Adsense. I’ve been claming close to four times that figure just by promoting a product instead of shitty Adcents. One small change can make a wealth of difference. If somebody is selling their creation, and the only revenue stream they have is from Adsense – Take a good look! You might find yourself another of these mythical sleeping giants I’m raving about.

3. Is the niche going to present me a legitimate business opportunity?

Take a look at this list. Do you feel it inside? Come on, we’ve all felt it. The temptation to invest in some bat shit crazy microniche just because there’s an interest from 45000 local searches on Google. That feeling…is the affiliate’s desire to hoard fucking with you. It’s easy to spend a lifetime investing in new web assets. But if you’ve got no viable business plan for monetizing them, you’re not waking a sleeping giant. You’re just wasting your time. And giving GoDaddy another reason to ping you an expired domain notification twelve months from now.

Affiliate marketing is a mere tip of the iceberg when it comes to making money online. Yes, there are plenty of opportunities in following the tried and tested niches. But there’s also a lot of money to be made in taking the knowledge of referral marketing and applying it to websites where affiliates wouldn’t normally bat a glance of interest.

Once you know how to monetize assets effectively, you simply need to find the right opportunities to invest. With hundreds of forums and blogs falling abandoned every single day, are you telling me there’s not a bargain to be had out there? Put on your best Duncan Banntyne scowl and get to it.

Recommended This Week:

  • If you haven’t read it from front to back already, snap up a copy of the brilliant 4-hour Work Week by Timothy Ferriss. Inspiring stuff for any affiliate marketer.

  • If you’re looking to explore some very different but potentially very profitable micro-niches, take a look at ShareASale. It’s like a CJ that isn’t run by a bag of dicks.

  • Feel free to add Finch to your Facebook. Yes, this is the right link. My real name is not actually Finch.

Creating High Demand With A Fake Error Page

A few weeks ago, I set my alarm for 8:30am with thousands of other UK music fans. It didn’t matter that I was hanging like a dog without a bone. I wanted to buy Glastonbury tickets and I knew the usual painstaking process of navigating an online jam on SeeTickets.com.

If you’ve never been sat at your desk trying to buy Glasto tickets, let me explain the process for you.

– Tickets are due to go on sale at 9am.
– Tickets somehow end up going on sale at 8:50am.
– SeeTickets.com couldn’t handle the demand and crashed at 8am.

What usually follows is a three hour F5 mashing session, hopelessly contesting with thousands of other users the chance to buy a ticket that at £185, is bordering on scandalous for a festival where not a single act has been confirmed.

I was one of the lucky ones. After receiving dozens of error messages and “server timed out” notifications, I finally made it to the booking page. I guarantee you this. You’ve never seen somebody fill out a form and hand over their credit card details so quickly in your life.

It wasn’t until my confirmation email arrived that I thought to myself “Actually, that’s quite an effective selling technique”

Frustrate me to the brink of tearing my hair out by not letting me buy something I want. I had a think about the psychology behind it all. On Twitter, I could see Glastonbury trending and thousands of frustrated fans struggling and bitching over their inability to bag a ticket.

It dawned on me that, actually, the Glastonbury organizers couldn’t give a shit how bad the ticketing process is. They probably quite like the sound of a thousand music fans begging for the chance to buy a ticket. It’s the creation of high demand. It adds to the prestige.

This week it happened again. Take That, a group you need not investigate if you don’t already know them by sigh, crashed every ticketing website that was supporting their tour. BBC and Sky News reported on the incident and what happened 24 hours later? The group released ten extra dates! I’m willing to bet that any Take That fan who wasn’t already aware of the concerts, will have rushed out with even more incentive to buy tickets upon hearing the demand.

Creating an illusion of high demand is something that can be applied to your affiliate campaigns too. I started to think about how I could use a scenario similar to a frantic rush to buy tickets. How could I build hype around my service by creating this illusion of such high demand that the user HAD to act now or miss out altogether?

Well, I’m not going to give away my exact creatives. But I came up with a unique slant on my dating landing pages that looked like this:

“PAGE LOAD ERROR!

“We are experiencing an unprecedented high demand from 35-40 year old females to join DatingSiteX.com. We could not process your request.”

“As a result, we are only able to accept another [4] new registrations before *insert your little PHP date script here* when our invitation will be closed.”

Please click here to try our mirror site

The “Fake Error Page”, if you will. A landing page so fiendishly innocent and so clinically effective that I felt bad for even using it. I’ve often enjoyed an upturn in conversions when I’ve put it to the right use. But as with most things affiliate marketing, the money is in the execution.

My intention was firstly to produce a creative that sold the fact that this really was the “next big thing” in terms of dating sites. So your banners are going to be important in that stake. But critically, the landing page was to establish an illusion of high demand. Now let me just say that you’re not going to enjoy much success without a very specific line of approach here. It can’t be a standard error page.

You have to get creative and design something that retains the reader’s attention. And for that, you’re going to have to stop reading this blog and grow your own ideas instead of jacking mine.

Of course, when the user clicks the mirror site link, they get taken straight through to the registration page. Except they’ve had the illusion enforced in their heads that this site really is the dog’s bollocks. Be careful not to use this ploy on the wrong crowd. You don’t want to advertise to tech savvy bastards who take your page load error as a sign of weakness and leave on their high horses.

Nobody wants to miss out and nobody wants to feel left out. It’s a very simple technique. It’s also a technique that needs to be applied VERY carefully to avoid losing too much traffic. When I tell people that I blew X amount of dollars sending traffic to an error page, I’m not always pissed off about it.

There are many other ways to establish an illusion of demand in your service. I’m sure a lot of the guys who’ve published flogs and farticles will be aware of them. Some are misleading, some are just too downright effective for mainstream advertisers ever to dare use them. Either way, you shouldn’t be afraid to get creative and try something different.

Some of the most effective campaigns I’ve come up with have been born out of religiously studying people’s browsing habits. What they do, what they click, why they click it. You can drive yourself to the point of insanity just by watching how people react to various traits of the web around them.

Ironically, as I went to publish this post just ten seconds ago, I received an Internal Server Error.

That’ll be Karma shagging me in the arse.

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