Offer A Quick Fix = Get A Quick Conversion
I’ve Got Zero Experience And I Want To Be Rich
Are Your Landing Pages Failing To Convert?

Offer A Quick Fix = Get A Quick Conversion

Not too long ago, I wrote a post praising the brilliance of Ca$hvertising as a must-have book for all marketers. Hopefully a few of you have read it by now and can verify that I wasn’t bending you over in the name of an Amazon commission. That book really is the dog’s bollocks. And if you don’t have it, you should order it a-sap.

One of the many subjects that Ca$hvertising touches on is the importance of offering a quick fix in your advertising campaigns. I thought I’d make an effort to cover why this is so important, and warn you of how being a misleading little rascal can land you in a hot tub of shit.

By the very competitive nature of advertising, we’ve reached a tipping point. Consumers can find a mind-boggling number of reasons not to buy a product. One of those reasons is that a product simply doesn’t capture their imagination. It doesn’t promise a life changing impact overnight. The cold hard truth that losing weight can take months of blood, sweat and tears is often much less of a sales pitch than oh – I don’t know – lose half your body weight in 4 weeks.

To many affiliates, offering a quick fix is simple. Lie until you’re purple in the face and pretend you’re the fucking gingerbread man when the FTC comes calling. We only have to look as far as the acai berry craze to see how the promotion of a “quick fix” can get out of hand. Really bloody quickly.

It’s easy for me to sit here and rag on affiliates for lying with bold promises that are never going to come to fruition. But that’d make me a massive hypocrite. We all lie in our marketing efforts, and those of us who don’t simply forget to tell the truth.

If you’re going to learn anything from the acai berry gravy train, let it be that a quick fix will always prize that credit card out of the pocket. And there are techniques we can use that exploit this need for a quick fix, without getting our balls trapped in the crocodile jaws of [Insert General Attorney of Choice here]. You don’t have to sell your soul down the river.

It’s possible to build trust as an affiliate, and I’ve long stressed a personal desire to distance myself from slinging rebills that leave nothing but a sour taste in the mouth. Offering a quick fix doesn’t have to involve blatant lying though. It can simply be smart savvy marketing.

A technique I played with quite recently involved giving away a free ebook to my dating leads. We’ve all heard of Plenty of Fish, right? I haven’t spoken about *that* traffic source before, mainly because it served to benefit nobody who was already advertising there (rising click costs, invasion of newbies etc).

But if you’re advertising on Plenty of Fish, what do you know about your target audience? We can guess that we’re marketing to singletons who still haven’t found that special somebody. Despite putting in a clear effort by joining a dating site.

I think the reason so many affiliates fail with their advertising efforts on POF is because they forget to sell the appeal of the site they’re promoting. Think about what would constitute a “quick fix” to an existing dating site member. Maybe the women aren’t replying to your messages, maybe the guys are a bunch of narcissistic dicks with zero conversation skills. Either way, you need to establish something that you can fix.

I chose to give away a free ebook offering “ten explosive tricks for getting girls to message you on dating sites”. I will have you know that I outsourced it and didn’t write that shit myself. I then built out a landing page with an opt-in form.

“Sign up to my hot-shit newsletter and not only will I show you how to get women messaging you on dating sites, but I’ll send you an exclusive rare invitation to the best dating site to practice these tricks. I can only give away this link to [7] guys. If you’re sick of being Read & Deleted, you need to ACT NOW!”

Boom shake, shake, shake the room. Conversions, opt-ins, orgasms, profit. Everybody wins. By offering a quick fix to the biggest problem a guy can face on a dating site – being ignored like he’s carrying the plague (obviously I outsourced the research too) – you can slice through the competition and simply convert better than everybody else. Not to mention, if you use this method, you’re building yourself a long term business asset in the list.

But think about the concept. Don’t just jack my shit and run it for yourself. The second you place yourself in the collective shoes of your target market, you can find something to fix. Sometimes it’s necessary to develop your own freebie giveaways, like I did with my ebook, in order to present that quick fix without scamming the user or placing false promises in a service that might not be able to deliver.

There’s only one trick that works better than a quick fix. And that’s a quick fix that won’t be here tomorrow. So always remember to splash your landing pages with the urgency of countdown tickers, expiration dates and whatever else Ryan Eagle has recently added to his Network Application page.

It’s a sad state of affairs that consumers are so hesitant to place their faith in anything that doesn’t offer overnight results. But that’s the reality, so we have to adapt to it. Ask yourself what you can do for the user today. Then focus on developing a brand that’s simply too convenient for them to walk away from. If you find a quick fix, you’ll get a quick conversion.

Still haven’t bought Ca$hvertising?

Last time I recommended Ca$hvertising, the book was out of stock within a few days so I’ve got good faith that you guys went out and bought it. If you don’t already own it, buy it now.

Today is a rarity. I’ve actually published two posts in 24 hours. If you’re looking for some more reading, check out How An Affiliate Deals With 9am – A guest post I contributed to Kirsty’s blog over at Affiliate Stuff. Thanks for the guest spot, Kirsty.

Finally, follow me on Twitter.

I’ve Got Zero Experience And I Want To Be Rich

I seem to have accumulated a lot of readers with little Internet Marketing experience. It’s flattering that people read my shit without actually caring a jot about affiliate marketing, or even knowing what it is, but those same people have started to ask me questions. Questions like “I’d kinda be interested in making money online, can you show me where to start?”

Ahh, yes, that one.

Zero experience, never made a website before, you thought FTP was some kind of late night porn channel, and now you want to make money online. You just need to know where to start.

This post goes out to anybody reading who isn’t an affiliate marketer, but simply an everyday guy or girl with a full-time job who wants to make some extra income online. And by that token, I’m suddenly speaking to half of the fucking Internet.

Your first challenge is to sign out of the forums. Stop visiting Warrior Forum, cancel your Digital Point account and don’t even try to digest what you’re reading on WickedFire. Forums will only complicate your objectives.

I swear, The Warrior Forum reminds me of the scene in The Wire where Bubbles tells a crowd of junkies the story of his drug addiction. I sit here listening to another buffoon reel off his Russian novel of “Warrior Advice!!!” and then when he’s finally stopped bashing his keyboard, the other Warriors stand up and cheer…THANKS FOR SHARING! As if his own pandering to the gutter is their new ambition in life.

Shitty ideas put forward by shitty marketers, sodomizing each other with tales of pity, and rubbing the only ego their four cents can afford. But the shit never stops smelling of roses when there’s a retarded “Thanks for sharing!” at the end of it all. Right?

Okay, I’m getting vicious. I don’t mean to hate on the Warrior Forum, but it’s too much of a swamp to help you. If you’re spending all day reading these forums and looking for a magic formula to start making money, you’re wasting your time.

Find something you’re passionate about, something you could sit there and write about every night.

To enjoy success online without delving in to paid advertising, you need to have an asset. To develop an asset, you need to have a website that other people would want to visit. While a select few of us can develop money generating websites based on topics we couldn’t give two shits about, you will nearly always have more success when your project is something you have a genuine passion for.

It’s a simple concept called appealing to your strengths. If you burden yourself with weaknesses by trying to build a website in a niche you’re hopeless with, and can offer no expert opinion on, you’re going to fail. Especially in these early days. Passion is everything.

Whenever I’m guiding people with the “online business bug”, I try to focus on their strengths. If you can find what they’re passionate about, you can guide the mentality away from “MONEY MONEY MONEY” and channel it towards a more positive energy. Such as “what kind of website can I build to appeal to people who share my passion?” My opinion is that if you don’t love what you do enough to do it every day without a single penny of profit, it won’t work. Not if you’re a bumbling technology tard who’s doing this for all the wrong reasons.

It’s so easy to setup a WordPress blog, grab some cheap hosting, and give yourself a web presence. In fact, it’s too easy. WordPress is quite possibly the greatest software ever developed for those who know nothing about coding. But people forget that building a website is like planting a seed. Just because you can see it, that doesn’t mean you’re ever going to make a cent from it. To make money, you need to water it every day with fresh content and spend a lot of fruitless hours wondering when anybody will visit but still chugging along regardless.

I can’t remember who posted this, so I’m sorry I can’t credit you, but one of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever seen for making money online was posted on WickedFire last week.

“Pick a topic you love, setup a blog and write about it every night. Come back in six months and I’ll tell you how to make money.”

So, so true. It’s only when you suspend your fixation with the making money part that you’ll begin to prosper and develop quality assets. If I had ever let money dictate my decisions and willingness to work, this blog wouldn’t be here. It’s here because I love writing and I love my job.

Everybody has to start somewhere. So if you’re looking on, a keen bean to make money online, first ask yourself “What is my passion?”

What can you write about every night? What do you have a special talent for that other people would like to have? There’s a niche for fucking everything on the Internet.

The next step is to setup a WordPress blog. Grab yourself a free template that looks nice. It doesn’t have to be professional. Now spend every night contributing something, no matter how big or small, to your site. The snowball effect will slowly gather pace over the months, but ONLY if you keep supplying new fresh content. Most people fail because they give up if their empire of riches hasn’t materialized in the first week.

They’re snobs of their own creations.

Not enough comments? Not enough people reading? Still got zeros in your commission columns? The loser walks away with his tail between his legs and probably spends the rest of the week being angry at life flipping burgers in his day job. It takes time to hit success. And that success might not change your life. Christ, you might only make $100 on the side in a month. But the experience of your journey will become knowledge.

With knowledge, this whole world of making money on the Internet will no longer seem so alien. Some of what you read on this site may slowly begin to make sense.

We all had to start somewhere. But if you want to catch up, you better get your feet wet and start learning fast. There are enough passionate individuals out there to run those who only want to make a quick buck out of town. Focus on your strengths, forget the money objectives and let Father Time and hard work open those doors for you.

Networking and connecting

I decided against making the trip to New York for Affiliate Summit East. Mainly because Adtech is rolling in to London, my hometown city, next month. If you’re going to be at the event, feel free to hit me up and we’ll arrange a meet. And by meet, I mean a pint. And by pint, I mean several. Read more about London Adtech here.

Do you have a UK based blog covering similar themes to this site? I’m currently looking for guest posting opportunities. If you’d be interested in letting me post a piece for your site, please get in touch via email.

Looking for more affiliate advice? Want to read the 140 character drivel of somebody who actually makes money on the Internet? Follow me on Twitter.

Are Your Landing Pages Failing To Convert?

When I get asked questions about building landing pages, I’m always left with the impression that affiliates are searching for an exact science.

Unfortunately in affiliate marketing, there’s rarely such a thing as an exact science. If something works, it’ll make you money. If it doesn’t, it won’t. Everything between the margins is a matter of testing, being creative and sometimes copying what others are already doing.

Everybody has their own opinion for what makes a great landing page. But this is my blog so fuck everybody else, here’s how you do it. Finding the magic formula is a question of ticking three little boxes.

1. Am I writing in a way that my intended audience can understand?
2. Am I writing in a way that sells my service or product to that audience?
3. Am I writing in a way that gets them to act now?

If you can answer yes to all three questions, congratulations. Puff your tits, buy your copywriter some lunch and look forward to making some profit.

If the answer to any of those questions is no, it’s back to the drawing board. Your landing page probably sucks as many balls as you feared it did when the conversions failed to lift off.

There’s a fourth factor to any successful landing page. The artistic and graphical layout of the page can make a huge difference to ROI. I’ve seen landing pages with a yellow background convert irritatingly better than those with a white background. I could get deeply entrenched in the effects of changing tiny details for boosting conversions, but I don’t have the attention span today so we’re going to stick with the language.

The actual meat and potatoes of your page – the shit that’s going to dictate whether you can actually afford any meat and potatoes when the wife goes shopping – is the writing. The words you use and the language you choose. Nothing sells an offer like some badass sales copy driving daggers through the consumer’s “will I or won’t I?” doubts.

How do I write in a way that my intended audience can understand?

Just because you’ve got a full English degree, doesn’t mean you should be busting out fucking Shakespeare wordplay on a 13 year old kid.

I’ve lost track of the number of landing pages I’ve seen where the language is quite blatantly phoned in from the notepad of an affiliate marketer who expects his language to be universal. Always write to the lowest common denominator.

If there’s a good chance that 40% of your target audience is too retarded to pick up a book – and let’s face it, CPA and Retards are a match made in heaven – BE SIMPLE!

I know you want to sound impressive and knowledgeable, but most landing pages are simply a medium of showcasing what makes a product such a fantastic solution for your target. If the prospect doesn’t understand, or is struggling to digest the copy, you’re letting your artistic greed ram a fist up your own jacksy. It’s never going to make you money.

Use short sentences. They’re much easier to read. Most of America can understand this. Simple sentences increase your reading speed. They also encourage people to read more. So they’ll learn more about your product. And this can only be a good thing, right?

How do I write in a way that sells my service or product to that audience?

See the question at the end of the last paragraph? This is probably my favourite use of language for selling any service or product. It doesn’t matter what you’re promoting, if you can get consumers to answer “YES” over and over again, half your job is done.

So much of writing to sell is about building up momentum and creating a positive image in the consumer’s head. The greater the momentum and the stronger that image becomes, the more likely you are to push the final sale.

Asking questions where the consumer has no choice but to agree or nod their head can really ramp up the effectiveness of your landing pages.

We’ll take a landing page promoting a dating offer to women over 50 as an example. Of course, it helps to hit them with the features and benefits of your service. But you can also generate that helpful momentum by getting the target to agree with you.

“You’ve waited long enough for love. It’s your turn, wouldn’t you agree?”

“If you leave love to fate, it might never happen. But if you join us today, you’ll be taking one step closer to happiness. Do you care about your happiness?”

“Our women were much happier with their lives after we helped them find loving partners. Are you searching for that new spark of romance?”

After each of these sentences, the user is forced to agree. It’s just a natural flow that builds momentum and keeps them interested. It makes them aware of their weaknesses indirectly and thus much more likely to snap at your bait.

Get your targets to say yes repeatedly and they’re much more likely to say yes when it matters.

How do I write in a way that gets them to act now?

If you don’t ask, you don’t get!

Would a charity worker ever get you to sign up to donate if she just left her phone number? Of course she wouldn’t. She’s harassing your arse outside the train station, backing you in to a corner and plying you with horrific imagery until you can see no light at the end of the tunnel when she asks for your financial help.

I remember the last charity worker I met in Shepherds Bush, we had an amusing conversation where I was pretty much filling in her next sentences. “You’re gonna ask me how I can afford to eat these McCoys but not donate £3.50/month to orphan monkeys in the jungle wilderness, aren’t you?”

I laughed because it works. It always works. The reason charities gets donations is because they have the balls to get in your face and ask for them.

So many landing pages out there fail miserably at the last hurdle. They do a fantastic job of selling a service but they forget the importance of a Call To Action. No CTA is effective without promoting the scarcity and urgency of what you’re offering. Yet you already know this because it’s all around you.

“Sale Must End Tonight”, “If you call in the next 20 minutes, ’cause we can’t do this all day…”, “Now accepting [7] new affiliates”

You know what they’re trying to do and still you can’t fight it. Scarcity manipulates the human desire not to miss out, while urgency rams the point home and seals the sale. Combine the two attributes with an unflinching Call To Action and what do you have? Profit.

Help me grow naturally

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